Tuesday, July 15, 2008

I've Heard the Flannery Kids Called Lame (I'm not saying where)

I started a friendly newsy post listing what each member of the family has been doing lately but even I was bored reading it so I decided to repost this from my own blog.

We have literally thousands (OK maybe thousand, look we're not made of money here) of dollars of toys in the "playroom" at our house. Why do I put the word playroom in quotes? No, it's not just that I don't know how to properly use quotes as you'll find here (No, seriously, go. You won't be sorry. I'll wait. ------ Back? OK, let's continue,) It's because no one plays in it. EVER.

The playroom has become the repository for mountains of toys. And the mountain is so big and so high and so tall (1,000), that on one even tries to dig through it to find a toy. Do they look for games? Not a chance. How about dress-ups? Surely the princess wants to dress up. Negatory good buddy (2,000).

The playroom is too much of a mess to do anything with (and some day soon, I'm going to go in there with an empty garbage bag and come out with a soul so very much lighter) so my children, resourceful small people that they are, have found alternate methods of entertainment. Something that they can and do spend hours at a time doing, something that brings joy to their little hearts, something that keeps them relatively quiet and non-fighting for nearly the whole day. What is this magical instrument of fun? you ask.

It's the TELEVISION! And if I have to hear the "i-Carly" theme song one more time I'm going to put a bullet through my head.

Seriously, it's summer. No school, sunshine, the last few days it haven't even been too hot, and all my kids can do is sit on their posteriors watching other kids, inane, bad acting kids, doing things. My kids don't even play the Wii!

I should make it clear here that I'm really just referring to Maggie and Aidan here, Ike will happily ride his big wheel around the yard for hours and Ian is only 7 months old, just give him something disgusting and dirty to chew on, preferably a shoe, and he's set. If he loses his thing to chew on, however, it won't be any of his older siblings who help him out, at least not while "Chowder"'s on. I came in from outside Monday, drill in hand, to find the baby screaming on the floor and both Maggie and Aidan sitting on the couch not 3 feet away eyes glued on Spongebob. Nice.

This morning I made them come outside and help clean up some of the cement from the recent demo of some steps. They fought over the shovel, the work gloves, they even fought over the chunks of concrete (as if there weren't enough of those around) and then started the whining. Finally I said, "hey I know what you can do, you can go sit on your lazy butts in front of the television." And they were gone. Sarcasm (and therefore the majority of what I say) is so lost on my children.

After spending the last two days working on the kitchen and seeing through the window my precious children turning into precious lumps on the couch I finally lost it. I unplugged the TV.

I know, drastic measures. But I couldn't, could not take it for one more minute. Maggie threw a royal fit, something she's been doing a lot since she got home from grandma's (thanks Pen). And Aidan proceeded to follow me around literally hanging on my arm and asking when dinner was. It was 12:30.

Seriously, these kids have bikes. They have scooters (OK scooteR, but still), they have a swing-set and a sandbox and a yard, all at their disposal. Too safe? Well, we are doing construction. There are also hammers and all manner of nails and wood which they are allowed to play with and destroy 'til their little hearts are content. (I do have three boys after all) There are rocks a plenty, and dirt in abundance. I know if they put one ounce of effort into it they could get something really fun going.

But they don't, they sit and whine and look for things to eat and whine and ask if they can play on the computer and whine. This TV unplugged thing is working so well I think the TV may just stay that way for the rest of the summer.

2 comments:

Molly said...

I highly doubt Penelope was encouraging Maggie to throw royal fits when she got home. That seems a little harsh.

Alayna said...

If you like the quote blog you should check out stuffwhitepeoplelike.com. I would do a hyperlink but I don't know how. They recently added correcting grammer and punctuation to the list of stuff white people like.